i have had many girlfriends.. ALL of which i have hurt, it is the same routine over and over again.. it all started with my first serious relationship.. i never thought of cheating, it wasnt even in my vocabulary.. we had 2 children, we had a good life.. then one day i got back from work and they were gone.. this was 5 years ago and almost killed me.. literally.. i have been able to move on somewhat.. and i have had partners since then.. i get to know them, spend alot of time with them.. it always starts out fantastic! but then.. after a while.. no matter how hard i try not too.. no matter how many times in my head i go over the concequences.. no matter how many times i sit down with my partner.. suggest new things.. try them, discuss everyhting openly.. i CANT stop myself.. its like i am a spectator to my own actions.. i come across someone to whom i am attracted to.. and it just takes over.. i try and try to get it out of my head, but the result is the same.. i cheat on my partner.. since the mother of my children left.. i have cheated on EVERY single partner i have had.. many times over.. i dont know whats wrong with me.. nobody can help me as nobody i have had the confidence and trust to talk to about it, has done the same thing and cannot provide advice.. and whats worse.. is the latest one, i have fallen in love with.. i mean when im at home all i can think of is being with her.. but it is impossible.. for us to be together.. but again.. no matter how many times i tell myself it cant happen, i cant be with her..i cant help it.. i dont know what else to do.. i need help..